About Me

I have been married for almost ten years now. I love my husband and I really do love being his wife! However… I’ve come to realize that what I thought marriage would be like and what it is actually like are two completely different things — at least for me.

My first realization back in 2011, after just 1 year of marriage was a trivial one…or maybe not, depending on how you look at it. (Realization #1: The Kitchen Sink Becomes a Battle Ground). Since that time the content I wrote about varied. Some posts were funny, other posts were more serious, and still others fell in that grey area that is often hard to categorize. I wrote about the ups, downs as well as in-betweens of married life, but regardless I always tried to look at marriage from a positive perspective. In fact, my goal with this blog was to present you with a realistic, yet positive perspective of married life, and I hope that came across.

Fast forward to 2015 and I had written 84 realizations by this point!… And then I stopped – cold turkey. I was running out of things to say and my readers I feel sensed that. The blog wasn’t energizing me anymore so I took a break.

It’s now 2019 and something is calling me back to this blog. I’m energized by it once again.

I write this blog under the veil of anonymity, so I can be free to write about my experiences / thoughts / joys / challenges / journey in marriage. This is my story in marriage, and I hope in reading this, it resonates with you and that you will be encouraged to share your story with me and other wives.

Who is this blog for? This blog is for the wife who doesn’t have a “perfect marriage”, but who also don’t have a “horrible marriage”. For the wife who doesn’t quite ft into the “Happy Wives Club” but is definitely not in the “Divorce Court” club. For the wife who is just trying to be the best version of herself she can be in her marriage. For the wife who wants to do better, and who strives to do better, even if she may fail sometimes…or a lot of times. For the wife who loves her husband so much and wants to be married, but who sometimes finds the journey challenging. This is for you.

Feel free to leave a comment on anything I post on this blog, and if you like what you see, please do share it with others! Please also remember to check out the Facebook page, “Like” it and share it with your friends!

Thanks so much! 🙂


90 thoughts on “About Me”

  1. Just Jocie said:

    Hey there!

    I have been married for almost 10 months now and glad I found your blog.

    Marriage is definitely an adventurous journey, in which we are constantly finding out new things about our spouses and they help us learn more about ourselves.

    Anyways looking forward to reading more of your posts 🙂

  2. I love your blog! So insightful. Isn’t it amazing how life really is vs. how we think (as brides) how it’s going to be?

    Thank you for your thoughtfull comments on my recent FP post about the Royal Wedding. I believe in marriage; I believe in still “dating” my husband and, after 19 years, it’s working for us.

    I’ll be back .. cheers! MJ

  3. What a nice blog! The topic you deal with is really funny! I will follow you (ps: I’m going to marry in June and I work as journalist in a marriage magazine. Do you think I’m in the right place? 😉 )
    See you soon.

  4. Well, I write for an italian magazine, so I don’t thing you’ve heard of it 😦 Anyway, its name is “La rivista degli Sposi” (the english translation is “The megazine of brides and grooms”). Where are you from?

  5. Cool!;) As the olden say: “It’s a small world”!

  6. sagitaip said:

    I haven’t been married but as every little girls had dreamt about, I’ll get married someday and I found the blog’s idea is awesome.
    I’ll link your blog into mine, so that I can read more from you.
    The blog is inspiring

  7. Hi,
    this is a great blog…actually I started a blog here only to journalize my journey towards marriage.. which is in October. Your blog is a good way to me, both to read and understand. Just like you said, I am not moving in before marriage and hence I am looking towards a lot of new things that are going to come up sooner!!! But this is awesome again, I will be following you to keep some important mental notes!!!

    • Thanks so much! It’s so nice to hear that other people can relate to this blog too! 🙂 (I’m sure my husband and I can’t be the only people who didn’t live together before marriage…although it seems like living together is the norm nowadays.)

      Congrats on your engagement and upcoming wedding! Enjoy the journey to the altar and the day itself—it flies by so fast!

  8. I’m glad to have stumbled on your blog, as it provides a realistic yet positive perspective about married life and you’ve done it all with a dose of humour! Here’s a toast to that 😀

  9. This is a really cool blog. I’m not married or close to it, but know what it’s like being in a relationship. [although i’m now single]…..I relate to what you have written! Great job.

    • Thanks so much for the compliment and for subscribing! 🙂 It’s so great to hear that people can relate to the stuff I am talking about. I also love to hear from people’s own experiences / realizations about (their own) marriage. Makes for an interesting discussion!

  10. Great blog, glad I found you. My husband and I have been married 4 years and it gets better every year. Always enjoy each other; laugh with each other; and be yourselves with each other. Most important: COMMUNICATE.

    I’m hosting a giveaway at my blog, you should check it out!


  11. I will be sharing this. There are so many blogs out there about parenthood, but many about marriage.

    • NOT many about marriage – sorry!

      • That’s so awesome! Thank you! 🙂 I notice that there are several “how-to” books / sites / articles on marriage, but not so many about personal experiences (i.e. amusing or not) and what you can learn from these experiences…so I thought creating a blog like this would be useful to some people. I also figured that I’m not alone in my experiences! I would love to hear from other people and the things they have realized after they tied the knot.

  12. Hi there,
    My mum found this blog and shared it with me. And I am so glad she did so! I am getting married in 3 months, and sometimes I can’t wait to be with my lovely man forever but sometimes I get so scared that I have second thoughts. It hasn’t been easy. But it is always good to get realistic perspectives and counsels on it. So, thank you for taking the time to post your realisations on here 🙂

    • Hi Andora!

      Thanks so much for your positive words! 🙂 This blog is just my way of sharing my “realizations” or experiences or sometimes even thoughts on what I think marriage is. It’s not a manual or a how-to guide, mainly b/c I don’t know everything there is to know about marriage. I’m still learning along the way too!

      With regards to what you said, I think there are many people (not just men) who may have doubts leading up to the day, because it’s a huge commitment you’re making to someone (particularly if you see it as, until death do you part)! Who wouldn’t be feeling scared!! (Well some people don’t, but some people do!) I went through the same motions at times during my engagement too, and I thought there was something wrong with me (i.e. why am I feeling this way and I should be 100% sure). Eventually though those feelings went away and I just kinda knew (I dunno how else to describe it) that I just wanted to be with this person. (The marriage preparation course at our church (we had to do it) def. helped and I would recommend that to anyone, Cathoilic or not!)

      Congratulations on your upcoming nuptials!! 🙂 Good luck with all your wedding planning, and enjoy the moment and day, b/c it flies by way too fast! 🙂

      • Thank you 🙂
        It is comforting to know that it is common to have the ups and downs when making this decision. Sometimes I get freaked out with what if this feeling never goes away. But I’m going forward with faith that the good things I feel are real.
        I have done some marriage classes in my Church as well and it was very helpful.
        So, again, thank you for keeping this blog and sharing your realisations with us. It helps a lot!

  13. I’ve stumbled upon your blog twice now, and I figured I should probably tell you how much I love it. I am not married, but I’d like to think I will be some day. 🙂

    I love how realistic and honest you are about your experiences. It’s refreshing to hear about marriage from someone who is clearly happy, but doesn’t sugar coat it. (I have a hard time believing my married friends that it’s soooo wonderful all the time.)

    Great job on the blog, and congrats as a newlywed!

    • Thanks! And, thanks so much for stumbling by, and for your positive words! 🙂 It’s really great to hear when people appreciate (or can relate) to what I have to say. That was my goal when I started this blog….to provide a positive, yet realistic perspective on marriage! (Although the blog is based on my own experiences, I’m sure I’m not alone on a lot of the stuff I am writing about!) 😀

  14. First things first, Happy marriage and happy married life. And congratulations on the same.
    Secondly, great blog. I stumbled upon it today, and have loved reading it. Thank you for such a great morning for me.

    Best wishes for your married life and convey my regards to your spouse as well.
    Happy living. 🙂

  15. travellingrome said:

    Nice idea!!I wish to get married in the next future….maybe few months. I try to follow you to discover a different cultural marriage or the same marriage in different contest (I come from Italy)

  16. Pallavi SenGupta said:

    I have been married about 6 months ago and today I found your blog. Your insights are so true in my case as well. I hope you keep writing and enlightening everybody 😀

  17. Hey..loved surfing thru ur posts…am married to my childhood sweetheart n its gud fun !Its li’l more than 3 yrs nw bt seems less than 3 mnths :):)I intend to write about us too n ur blog has sparked it further.Thanks ! Enjoyed ur posts..keep on posting..n Happy Married Life ! Feel free to visit my current site whnvr u free.. Best wishes to u both.
    Cheers !!

  18. Great blog – I just got married almost 2 years ago and your realizations are spot on.

  19. Hey There..
    I”ve only had time to read a few of your posts, but they have been great so far. I’m going on my third year of marriage, and I’m realizing things as I go along as well… Thanks for your posts!

    -Christie out!

  20. Hi! I’ve commented once before on how much I enjoy your blog, but I wanted to give you a “blog award” to say how awesome I really think it is. Yours is one of my favorites out there right now, so I wanted to say thanks!

    Check out my post about the Versatile Blogger Award:

  21. What a cool blog! Thanks for visiting mine today (, and for your kind comments. And because I can’t help it, a few words on marriage, from my perspective – married to same guy for 26 years. Main advice – give him a break. Expect the best. Look for his best. Appreciate every single thing you like about him. Try to ignore the stuff you don’t. Life is short. Find ways to focus on what you love about each other. Being “right” is joy-less. Who cares who’s right?
    – best – Kathy

  22. said: Hi! This is a great blog you have set up! Being new to the world of blogging, I’ve kinda stumbled across yours…and I’m glad I did! Your articles are very insightful. I’m not married myself but your “realizations” are helping me learn what to expect!

    Things You Realize After You Get Married said: Thanks so much for stumbling by, and thanks for the nice words! 🙂 Some people have referred to the posts as a “what to expect when you’re getting married” guide…lol Although every couples’ situation won’t be exactly like mine in marriage, I think the lessons or “take home” points are still applicable to a lot of couples out there (i.e. not badmouthing, the 80-20 rule etc)

  23. thebehenjialterego said:

    great short pieces on such clear thoughts and insights..i’m quite marriage-phobic and I think your blog has helped me more than any shrink could!

    • Thanks so much! That’s so nice to hear! 🙂 Marriage is a tough decision for some people, and that’s okay! But I def. think that more people should put careful thought into what it involves before they just jump into it. Once you’ve made the decision though, it can be quite an adventurous journey! 😀

  24. I have been browsing through your posts today and I can honestly say that your blog has put things into perspective for me. I am not married yet, but I have been fretting about what living with another person in matrimony would be like.

    There are a few married folks I know who I seek advice from, but I never exactly know what questions to ask. You are saving me a lot of headache (and possibly heartache) by writing such honest and insightful posts.

    P.S. Thanks for checking out my blog. I really appreciate it. ^^

    • No problem 🙂

      Thanks so much for the kind words. I wanted to be honest, a bit funny, but definitely not negative with this blog. Not everyone can / will be able to relate to my experiences, but there are a lot of couples who can. The response has been awesome! I also think it’s a great way to encourage couples to look at their marriage in a positive light. 🙂

  25. I found your blog via someone else’s and I love your “realizations”! I posted today on mine and included a link to yours. I hope my readers find your insight helpful, amusing, interesting, and real.

    Great blog!

  26. interesting! 🙂

  27. So I got curious and wanted an honest answer as to what marriage is REALLY like. All these articles popped up like “don’t get married!” and “its a death trap” etc.. they were slightly scary. But I love your posts! They are honest, bubbly, entertaining, funny, up beat, and well written. I usually don’t read or subscribe to blogs but I subscribed to you! Thank you SO much for the lovely blog.


    • Thanks so much! 🙂 I am not suggesting that everyone should run out and get married, but I think that for people who want to, they should be aware of what it involves–committment through the good times and bad (yes, there will be crappy moments)….Let’s face it, marriage is great at times, and sometimes it’s not so great, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t get married or it’s a death trap! Like all other things in life, it has its up and down moments, and if you are aware of this, you won’t run in the opposite direction whenever you experience the “down” times.

      • You are so welcome! I truly appreciate your honesty and showing both sides of the story, it is helpful for those of us considering it.

  28. Wow. Your blog seems a little bit like mine. Rusings on marriage – sometimes funny, sometimes serious. Are you a Christian? I am so my blog has a Christian perspective. I look forward to exploring your blog and hope you will stop by mine!

    • I have stopped by yours before, but I think you updated it recently with pictures? I totally can relate to the content as well! 🙂

      I am Catholic, but I try not to make the blog heavily Christian, so that all couples (Christian or not) can relate. I find that there are a lot of great blogs that already do that, so thought I’d try something different. I write about anything I feel that is relevant to marriage, and hope that others can relate and like it! 🙂

  29. Thank you so very much for noting my post (and blog) in such a great way. I truly do appreciate your thinking enough of the post to feature it on one of your very own. Again, many thanks. I actually have two blogs going right now…sportsattitudes and lifeattitudes. Hope you’ll stop by. I already had your site noted as one of my must-see’s…even before your kind words and contribution to my readership.

  30. matthew7:8girl said:


    So glad I found this. I love reading about relationships and pychology and such! Anything to help–and I think we all need a lot of help. I’m getting ready to be marriend, and I’ve started freaking out. I mean everyones warning me about how different it’s going to be and how it’s not anything like I imagined…almost like it’s bad and should be avoided at all costs. I’m scared! :/

    • Marriage may or may not be different from your dating life…it really depends on your relationship now and how it evolves over the years. If things do change, it’s not necessarily a bad thing, it is just an opportunity for you to grow and mature as a couple. Of course, at the time you may not feel that way (who does!), but in retrospect, these moments may have been the best learning lesson your marriage needed! Additionally, if your committment as a couple towards each other and your relationship is solid, you will come out of these tough times with a renewed strength in yourself and your ability to combat any obstacles your marriage may face over the years. 🙂

      Thank you for the positive words about my blog! 🙂

  31. Aww, I’m really going to enjoy your blog! I’m a happily married newlywed too (not even one year yet!) I’m always thrilled to hear people say positive things about marriage — or life in general — when so many people are cynical. Cheers!

    • Thanks very much for the positive words! 🙂 I don’t deny that marriage has both its ups and down, but regardless I do try to remain positive about it. This is a pro-marriage blog…. I feel that if you are planning to get married or already are married, why not make the best of your situation and truly enjoy your marriage right? This is what I try to get across through my blog posts, so glad to know it’s working!

  32. I just discovered your blog and, already it is one I know I’ll be visiting often. I got married at 39 and we just had our 2 year anniversary. Although I love my husband dearly and am thrilled to be married, I often find myself analyzing my life BW and AW (Before/After Wedding.) It seems I’m not the only one. I’m looking forward to reading your blog more!

    • Something definitely changes when you compare the BW and AW life—maybe not for all couples, but I bet for a good majority. I used to think I was the only one too, but ever since starting this blog, I’ve discovered that I’m not alone in my experiences–and now neither are you! 🙂 Thanks for commenting and for the positive words!

  33. Hi I’ve been married for 22 1/2 years. I’ve only read a few articles so far but I like them and so I have subscribed. Marriage is a journey for sure and if you both continue to work on it can be very fulfilling. I linked to your blog because of your post on the 80/20 rule..I resonated with what you wrote! Its so true.

    • Thanks for the kind words and for your perspective on marriage having been married 22 1/2 years! I definitely agree that marriage is a journey and can be very fulfilling if you choose it to be that way! And also, if you look at marriage in terms of the 80:20 rule, it definitely helps to realize what you have in your relationship and be appreciative vs. pining over what you don’t have. Thanks for commenting! 🙂

  34. I would however like to say that it is rather the reverse. Women change due to a reaction from their husbands. Truth to be told most women get into marriage with the intention to make it work. So they put all to make it work. Men on the other hand treat women as if they were in a conquest. More so why women ask the question why their husbands change after marriage.

    • Thanks for stopping by and commenting. Not all men view their wives as a conquest or treat them as such—my husband doesn’t, and neither do a lot of other husbands’ I know. While a few husbands may feel this way (I’m not saying such guys dont exist–they unfortunately do!), they do not represent the norm, nor should they. It’s often this small group that gives a bad rep to the rest of men out there who are really good husbands and do try their to in their marriage……..I think what may be confusing / frustrating for women is that men may not try as hard (or in the same way as we would expect them to) after marriage, as they did before marriage. This may be why some women feel that their husbands viewed them as a conquest, and now that they have conquered them don’t need to try as hard.

  35. Hi
    I wish i came across this blog earlier. There is so much to read! Small point that many bloggers do not realise – when you say “I recently got married and have been married for two years now,” a few years later it is no longer true! 🙂 Maybe you could add the year of marriage?

  36. hey i am not married but your blog is interesting to follow.

  37. I got married for the first time 6 months ago. and very Happy! This is great to read!

  38. I have nominated you for an award ( )
    Congrats 🙂

  39. As I was browsing through your blog, it hit me how we all are in the same boat,feeling the same emotions and tackling same situations irrespective of geographic locations!! I will complete 1 year of marriage in April with my boyfriend of 5 years 🙂 and I totally identify with all that you have written. I have forwarded the link to all my recently married girlfriends and they loved it too. Makes me feel so good i’m not the only cynical one cribbing about these issues to my frns. All the best dear 🙂

    • Haha! 🙂 Your comment touched me, while at the same time reminding me of how although I love my husband, there are things about him / our relationship that still drive me up the wall–but it’s trivial things at best. But as you point out, everyone has those crazy moments in their own relationship and it is definitely reassuring to know we’re not alone in our experiences!…. I started this blog with the goal of providing a realistic yet positive perspective of marriage and I’m really glad that comes across to people reading it. Thanks for stopping by and commenting and for sharing this blog with your friends. 🙂

  40. I just stumbled upon your blog and read a few pages and you are very insightful! I can’t wait to read more of your posts 🙂 My husband and I have been married for seven years (together for ten) and we have definitely been through many of these experiences 🙂

  41. This is wonderful. I have only looked at titles so far but I love your blog already. After 27 years of marriage, I am still head over heels in love with my husband but it is so refreshing seeing marriage through the eyes of a newly married woman. Thanks for sharing your blog/marriage with us all.

  42. I was married 8 years and threw that I was abused and taken for granted and cheated on for most of it, but threw it we created 3 amazing kids and I don’t regret a moment of it because I learned that what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger, and I believe there is a man out there that’s going to love and accept my kids as his own, and that will love and want to be with me, things weren’t perfect on my end either I tried standing up for myself and ended up making things worse, so I hope that all couples are blessed with long happy marriages an relationships, if they hurt they aren’t worth it..

    • I’m so sorry to hear about your abuse, but I admire your positive outlook on your past and your future. I do believe that what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger too and it sounds like your experiences have made you a stronger woman as a result. Thank you for sharing you story and all the best in your life. 🙂

  43. why did i got married 😕 i dont know.

  44. one of the greatest journey in life is getting married and discovering things that are totally different from what you expect but its fun trying to figure out how to deal with them without turning off the flame, I guess that’s why 2 people needs to cooperate and communicate constantly

  45. I’m writing a similar blog at present,
    Really interesting to read about the experiences of others, for me at present, as I have just got married:)
    Thank you for writing it x

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s