When I am writing a post, I sometimes feel as though that post will be the last good idea I will ever have to write about. Because my blog topic is very specific, I am limited in what I can write…which isn’t necessarily a bad thing if I had an endless stream of ideas. I don’t.
The other day though, a reader whose blog I follow, and who I’m glad to have met over the blogosphere, suggested that I write about even the “teeny unimportant things in marriage”, not just the big revelations. And I believe this is a great idea because sometimes, it is the trivial things that can teach you a lot about your relationship, yourself or just life in general. Sometimes these trivial things can even lead to bigger revelations down the road.
Take for instance that fact that I am a planner by nature and leave nothing to the last minute. And naturally, planners tend to (this is speculation on my part — I don’t have any stats to back up my claim here) end up with non-planners. At least this is what I’ve noticed from the couples in my life. I sometimes wonder if this is because two planners in a relationship would drive each other insane. After all, planners tend to like to do things on their own and in a way that suits them best. This means then, that a relationship between a planner and a non-planner should be a harmonious one (most of the time). A yin to a yang, right?
Of course, it’s hard to agree with this assertion when your other half’s yin doesn’t gel with your yang, but trust me, in the long run this difference actually works to your benefit. In fact, I’ve seen it play out beautifully in so many relationships in my life. For instance, I’ve noticed how the couples in my life, married or not, work together given this obvious difference. Although the non-planner half may complain about the planner’s insistence on planning things in advance, organizing things at the time or doing things a certain way, they also at the same time respect and even admire these very qualities. Because for instance, it can allow for a stress-free or worry free Christmas party. On the flip side, planners also appreciate their go-with-the-flow counterparts who keep them from losing their cool when things don’t go as planned before or even during an event. At times like these, I am SO glad for my husband who keeps me sane and reminds me that whatever it is that is happening, in the bigger scheme of things, this is not a big deal. Really babe, it isn’t, my husband often says to me… several times!
And you know what? He’s absolutely right! This is something we should all remind ourselves of, planners and non-planners alike, in every aspect of our lives, and especially in marriage. Every time something gets to you, gets under your skin and really makes you twitch, ask yourself, in the bigger scheme of things, will this really matter?
This is the way I see it. A New Year will be upon us soon, and I’m thinking that most of the things we complain about or that drive us up the wall in our relationship, in the bigger scheme of things really aren’t that big of a deal! So why not start your marriage in 2013 with a fresh slate. After all, life is too short to be dwelling on the pointless things of 2012 that really didn’t do much for you, your other half or your relationship!
Merry (Belated) Christmas & Happy New Year everyone! 🙂